Let’s get to it! There are five major categories that I always look for when I critique and make nachos. I came up with this as a guide to help me better understand nachos. It’s so important to figure out what does it for you in life. This is what “does it” for me.
This is my PNF- my Perfect Nacho Formula.
1. Cheese Factor.
This is number one for me. The more cheese the better! It’s not great for six pack abs, but it is great for healing your soul and bringing smiles to the masses. There are three kinds of cheese for nachos. A fan favorite for me is using shredded cheese that will be melted into the Cheese Pull of Your Dreams. I have always been a big proponent of asking for extra cheese when ordering nachos. That’s where the best social media pics come from.
There is also what I call- “Liquid Gold.” That would be the warm queso that you pour over your nacho. Ok, maybe drench it. If someone says to me, “Get your raincoat out. It’s about to rain liquid gold!”, that’s definitely a party that I am signing up for right away. You can’t threaten me with a good time, nor with cheese for that matter.
Lastly, we have the Crumbly Stuff. I love Cotija. It’s an aged Mexican cheese named after the town of Cotija, Michoacán. White in color and firm in texture, its flavor is salty and milky. Cotija softens when exposed to heat, but does not melt. That’s some tough guy cheese right there. It’s like the Rocky Balboa of cheese.
With so many kinds of cheese from all over the world, explore. Play the field and see what’s out there. Find out what you really like. Whatever cheese you may choose, just know I support you. There is no wrong answer. Insert Heart and Cheese emoji here.
2. Chip Check
Nobody likes a limp chip! Nobody likes a limp anything for that matter. That really goes for a chip that needs to support the weight of its partners. Keep it firm, people. If you are constantly grabbing at chips that break before you can even put them in your mouth…wait- is that the real definition of insanity? It would be for me. True to life, if you have a strong foundation, you can handle the weight of the world. This goes for nachos too.
3. Size Matters!
Of course it does. We all know this. When you first see a nacho, how does it size up? Will you be satisfied or will it leave you wanting more?
The bigger the better in my book. I have always preferred the mound of nachos over the flat ones. Mound or flat? Choose the mound. I had been forever in search of the ever elusive Nacho Everest and I want you to know I did find one in 2021. You will also be very pleased to know that in 2022, I found an even bigger mountain. I actually found a nacho volcano. This will all tie into “wow factor” below, but let it be known, it was the biggest nacho I have ever seen in my life to date and it was beyond impressive.
4. Love at First Bite.
Does the chip you first pull have a little bit of everything on it? As you keep pulling, does that trend keep going? You may have just found yourself what I call a “Gold Mine” Nacho! That's a nacho that you just keep winning with! When you find that, embrace it and savor it.
Not every nacho can be a gold mine, nor can every day be one, but that makes us really appreciate it when it does happen. Remember, you can’t truly appreciate the gold mine until you have experienced some really bad nachos. Bad nachos are necessary in life. They are learning opportunities for you to know what kind of nachos you really want. I want the best and most fun nachos for you always.
5. The Wow Factor
Is your nacho on fire? Is it being served to you in a Metal Shovel? Are there trash cans involved? If you answered yes to any of these questions- welcome to the world of Wow Factor.
Are there ooh’s and ah’s? Are your feet doing a happy food dance? I always hope so for myself and I hope the same for you. Presentation is everything.
I want the hell yeah. I want the fireworks. Put a casino grade sparkler on it and make me feel like I just won a prize. That’s some real nacho magic to me. Find that magic and save the world!
Alex P. Taylor
Copyright © 2023 Alex P. Taylor - All Rights Reserved.
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